17 January 2009

A New, Revolutionary Exercise That Can Help Anyone - Even You - Burn Hundreds of Calories Every Single Day With Virtually No Perceived Effort!

...and you get to hear about HERE on Groovy's blog first.

So get out your pen and paper and prepare to be amazed.

Step One: (and this IS definitely the most important step): Find a treadmill. Your treadmill doesn't have to be state of the art, but it should be electric and have readouts for mileage, mph, and calories burned. Bonus points if it is located in your own home. Research indicates that this power burn I'm talking about is most easily achieved at home as opposed to a gym.

Step Two: Dress in some stylish workout gear. It's easier to sweat it out when you look snazzy. I wear my nifty, lined pink and black wind pants and a long-sleeved fuschia t-shirt with a matching bandana rakishly tied about my forehead. Women should be sure to wear a sport bra underneath to prevent uncomfortable bouncing.

Step Three: Set aside some time for your workout. Experts recommend between 20 minutes and an hour.

Step Four: March in place and gently swing your arms for a few moments to warm up.

Step Five: Now it's time to get started. Turn your treadmill on to the lowest setting and carefully start walking. As you get comfortable with the pace, turn up the speed a little bit.

Step Six: As soon as you start to sweat, step off the treadmill but - and here's the secret - leave it running. In fact, at this point, you can crank that baby up on HIGH and really let it rip...

Step Seven: Go to the restroom (if you're my age you will NEED to go to the restroom!), make a couple phone calls, check a couple of blogs.

Step Eight: Head back to the treadmill. Turn it back down to LOW and step on. Make sure you take at least five full minutes to walk at this slower pace to cool down.

Step Nine: Note the number of calories burned. It should be somewhere in the vicintiy of 2,000 calories, depending on how long you worked-out.

Step Ten: Go eat some chocolate. You deserve it after all that hard work!


Keetha Broyles said...

LOL!!! You are my kind 'o gal.

Only, I think I'll skip steps 1 - 9 and begin at step 10.


Lauri said...

Ha! Groovy you naughty, naughty girl!

Paul Nichols said...

You're funny. I'd much rather walk outside. I can do all those things outside, too. You know, warm up or cool down, make phone calls, go to the bathroom (behind a bush), and eat chocolate. I really enjoy chocolate while I'm walking.

Those crazy treadmills...well, I can't think of a single use for them.

Dawn said...

Too too funny! I was wondering why you said it was better at home!

I used to walk like crazy - then being close to a bathroom became too important. I did the treadmill until I hurt my foot so badly at work 4+ years ago. I do the elliptical and the fake bike and do some weight stuff and back stretches. I wish I saw more results more quickly!

Keep up the good work, groovyoldlady!

BTW, thanks for stopping by and catching up with the soap opera that is my life.

Damselfly said...

Sounds like my kind of workout right about now!