It all started with a stiff neck and headaches and sore shoulders. Neither Mulletman nor I were sleeping well and we were both waking each morning "all bunged up" as Mm liked to call it.
This gave us cause to look up the word, "bung" to see if Mulletman was using it correctly.
According to all of our dictionaries (he insisted we search them all) bung means "to stop up a cask or barrel with a cork." This occasioned much laughter at my non-wordsmith husband until he pointed out an entry in our World Book Dictionary (1987). The final memorandum for bung says, "Slang. to bruise (as in "He tripped, fell, and bunged up his arms and knees.")"
So "bunged up" it was.
We arose each morning feeling bruised, stiff and achy, miserable and grouchy and old. We tried yoga (minus the meditation), popped OTC meds and herbs, researched stress and its effects on the human body, and we paid large sums of money to our chiropractor, Dr. Bob.
Bob is now so wealthy that his office is only open one day a week. The rest of the time he power-lifts heavy weights and eats whole steers so he is strong enough to de-bung folks like us.
Finally, after much analysis, we came to the conclusion that all this painful bunging was caused by keeping house and having children.
Just kidding! We actually deduced that all our discomfort was caused by our lousy, cheap mattress and our equally second-rate hand-me-down pillows. It was time to shell out some bucks for an upgrade. And so the search began…
My next installment will feature my groovy tips for purchasing a bed.